Releasing The Hostage: Blog 3 JAL 4/21/17

Dragons:

That is the symbol that I have been meditating and journaling about this week. It has brought up all sorts of deep anger in me. I am not angry at the dragon and my dragon is not an angry being. He is more of a spirit guide. I also have to say that at first, I was not sure how much the images and the active imagination were really getting at something inside of me. I felt as though I was just going through exercises. But, when I went to write my dragon paper for this week and I started looking back through my journal to see the evolution of this dragon in the various places where it showed up, I was taken aback.

The dragon really is trying to lead me somewhere healing. But, all of the emotion that this process has been bringing up is a bit overwhelming. I had no idea that in just a few weeks, I could be dragging so many things up. I think the next step is to begin to spend time thinking about how to heal these parts of me and how to use the material that is being brought up in this class to my benefit. I am also struggling with how to let go. I feel stuck and weighed down. Since coming back to New York, I have been comparing my journey to other people’s which I had stopped doing a while ago. It has been making me feel even more terrible.

            Another theme that keeps coming up for me are tarot cards. I think they are potentially a shortcut for me to access my unconscious via images. In the last week or two there have been multiple interactions around tarot cards. I used to read them when I was a kid. I think that my inner young person would like to speak quickly with this older person who is experiencing pain. I am not sure. The card at the top of this post is from the Llewellyn tarot deck. I am a Llewellyn and I tend to find that this deck holds a particular type of energy for me. In the past, I have liked working with Medicine cards as they are animal spirits. But, I like the meaning of the Star card.

Dragon Friendship

On wings of thunder
Honor bound
Search me out, I drum the sound
Twist and turn in the night
Dragon come, my guiding light.
Protector, guardian, friend not foe
Come to me, see my sigil glow.
Strong and true this friendship charm
I beckon thee, keep me from harm.
Around and about your magick swirls
Come to me
Your wings unfurled.

~ Bill Wescott